can't get to day one...please help

[kenley]

I posted here a few weeks ago, unfortunately, I could not get to day one, despite repeated attempts.
Thanks to all of you who responded. I could not reply, just felt unworthy of your messages. My apologies.

I am disgusted with myself, sleeping horribly, and once again watching a beautiful spring unfold with me doing the ludicrious drinking that prevents me from getting out, walking, taking pictures, calming down, exercising , and blessing my body for keeping me alive through this madness.

Saturday was going to be day one. Then Sunday. Then Monday. Now here we are, another failed day.

I gave up last July for a month. No problems whatsoever. Why is it now so difficult?
I gave up smoking in 1996, took it up again in 2000, gave up in 2003. The second time was much worse. (withdrawals, but I succeeded, on both occasions, cold turkey).


Why is this time (drinking) much more difficult?

I desperately need a plan, a simple one, to get to day one.
And through day one.
I can see (imaginatively) through day one, but I can't seem to get there yet.

If anyone of you could help me just to plan, and get through day one, I would be very grateful.

God bless you all.

[dreamer]

Go to the resource section. Lots of good stuff there. Also, PM member Lia. She has a plan in one of the sections but I am not sure how to link to it or where it is. It was the plan that worked for me when I first came here. Read the Easy Way to Quit Drinking. Go to AA and try SMART recovery. SMART is linked to in resource section. Do not leave site no matter what happens. Stay close to site. Take time off work if you need to. Don't drink. Go minute by minute, if you have to.

[Happy]

Saturday was going to be day one. Then Sunday. Then Monday. Now here we are, another failed day.

I gave up last July for a month. No problems whatsoever. Why is it now so difficult?
I gave up smoking in 1996, took it up again in 2000, gave up in 2003. The second time was much worse. (withdrawals, but I succeeded, on both occasions, cold turkey).


Why is this time (drinking) much more difficult?



Its the progressive nature of alcoholism and why many of us will do whatever is neccessary to prevent relapsing. If you load up on N/A drinks and lots of High carb foods like ice cream and pizza, get comfortable and spend the day here....read, post and talk to people...PM me if you want and others...If you can't make a day 1 that way, you should consider 3D help. AA, rehab and addiction counselling are a few options. This is doable
Kenley, but we need help. From here or in 3D, but its nearly impossible to do it alone!

[Jags]

I'm on Day 2 Kenley, and this is what I did. Get rid of all the alcohol in the house. Take a day off work, stay in the house, lock the door, don't go out, just let the day tick by. Eat lots and drink lots of N/A drinks.

If there's no Alcohol in your house, and you're not going out of the house, you'll make it through Day One.

Come onto the forums here, I've been on for what feels like 2 days straight, its helping, I don't feel alone, and my mind has been kept busy.

Give it a go!

[AJ]

Kenley, the first thing to do is get all of the alcohol out of the house. Either give it away or dump it pronto. Do not worry about watching money slide down the drain, it is more important that it is gone.

Second thing to do is get some food and non-alcoholic drinks in the house. Can you walk to the store or have someone go for you? Get some ice cream and other comfort food to get you through a few days.

Third thing is to stay very close to this site and talk to us. There are lots of people available here at all times who are willing to talk you through a craving. YOU CAN DO THIS, even if you don't believe it, we do. You can stop drinking today and say goodbye to the madness.

We're here for you. Do you know where the chat box is? Look up at the top of the page. When you feel the urge to drink, post in the chat that you feel like drinking and I promise you, someone will respond within minutes to hold your hand and get you through it. In the meantime, get the alcohol out of the house.

You can do it! :)

[mama cass]

I gave up last July for a month. No problems whatsoever. Why is it now so difficult?

My guess is that you treat this decision as something that can be undone. It is not. It is like an electrical switch. It is either on or it is off.

It will be tough. It will be hard as hell.

If you want the REAL YOU...work hard. Harder than you ever have before. Remember back when you used to be proud of yourself? Do it again. Ask anyone here for help when you need it.

[Changes]

Just like the others told you, stock up on your favorite foods. I ate tons of ice cream any time I felt like drinking for about three months. Sometimes I still do the ice cream thing if I feel like drinking. Your body often mistakes hunger for wanting to drink. Always have a n/a drink handy and sip on it throughout the day. I like fizzy water with a little juice in it to jazz it up. You can do this and it's not too bad if you take it one day at a time. That's all you ever need to do and we can all go just one day without drinking, can't we? If you have a really bad urge get in the shout box or post in your journal and ask for help. There's always someone around to help you out. Keep it simple by not drinking today and repeating tomorrow.

-changes

[Steve]

Make a doctor appointment for tomorrow. Go in and tell them you are an alcoholic and your trying to quit but can not get by day one. They will check your blood pressure. It will be high. When we quit, it is always high. They will give you some anxiety meds to take away from the withdrawl. We are all nervous about withdrawl. This will put your mind at ease. Start their and then start here posting.

steve

[Reachup]

Sometimes I think that fear of failing at a quit keeps us from starting a quit. I know that was true for me when I tried and failed to quit smoking. And it was true when I relapsed drinking after 3 months sober and found it SO hard to start another quit. I didn't want to accept that I really couldn't drink. And I didn't want to run the risk of starting a quit and failing it.

I agree with the others that there is no day quite as powerful as TODAY. You truly CAN succeed. It really, really is possible to leave this pain behind you.

[Rich]

Don't give up for the day give up for the minute

[Babble]

Hey,

Forget about counting.
Forget about failure.
Forget about forever.

Just for now ... don't drink

Read, post, occupy yourself.

make a list of triggers. Places, people, events, feelings that make you want to drink.
make a list of reasons why you want to stop.
Start a diary ...
Get involved with the reality of making change happen.

By the time you've done all that, you've made it to another 'now' without drinking.:eek:

You have all the answers inside.
Keep things simple and just allow yourself to come down to normality.

Great people here to help-just ask

M:D

[rick]

My advice is no different from what I've read in the other posts. Throw out the booze ... get N/A drinks ... get something to eat (hard at first, I know), and then --

SIT AT THE COMPUTER ALL DAY READING WHAT IS ON THIS SITE, POSTING YOUR THOUGHTS, AND ACCEPTING THE BLESSINGS OF THOSE WHO ARE HERE TO LOVE YOU (UNCONDITIONALLY, I MIGHT ADD), AND SUPPORT YOU.

If you are here, you can't be "there" (back in the bottle).

I really need to go back and find out who's quote this is, but repeat it over and over, make it your mantra. "I will NEVER drink again and I will NEVER change my mind."

[freemotion]

Hi Kenley,
Dont be too hard on yourself, you will get there. At least you have realised its time to make some changes which is why you are on this site. Have you read Allen Carrs easy way book? It has been a terrific help to me. Hope to have helped.
Best Wishes
Paul

[Megs]

You can do this, Kenley. Today is Day 1, yes?

Hang out with us, there's pretty much always someone around to chat with. Or just read lots - there's certainly plenty of stuff to read here. Visit some journals, read some peoples journeys, introduce yourself to people you feel a connection with.

Start your own journal, tell us a bit about yourself and why you want to quit drinking. People will come visit your journal with encouraging and understanding words. We're all here for the same reason, whether we've been here 10 minutes or 3 years or more.

Don't think about forever, or even about today, as Rich said. Ground yourself in the present moment and just deal with that.

You can do it.

[Hoots]

Kenley,

I have tried and failed on numerous occassions and each time I tried again it was much harder for me. I think its because I knew how easy it was to just give up and go back to old ways when the bashiz started to pile up.

I was told that I would quit when I hit rock bottom. F that saying! I do not have to wait till I hit rock bottom! Besides, I almost killed myself one night binging and that wasn't even enough. If I hit rock bottom, you can kiss my purty arse good-bye because while I was drinking I was digging my grave and its a pretty deep grave to fall into...not sure I'll make it out drunk.

I quit because I was tired of waking up hungover and shaking. I was useless! I was nothing.

Why do you want to quit? Post it everywhere in your house as a reminder. A good thing that everyone has told me is to stock your fridge with other drinks you like...non-alcoholic drinks. When you feel the need to drink, come here or call someone in person who can whoop your arse with a 4 x 4. Find something to keep you active. Find another goal besides digging your grave.

Just for today...do not drink,

Hoots

[k2]

Kenley,

I see a person called "Lights On" is on day one today. Maybe you can introduce yourself?

[Carousel]

Saturday was going to be day one. Then Sunday. Then Monday. Now here we are, another failed day.

I think everyone who has posted in this thread and most on this website know exactly that feeling K. You are in good company. Keep it simple, listen to these good people, and take it hour by hour if you need to. You CAN do it. You have it in you.

[ariel]

Hi Kenley,

You can do this.
You've got some good advice here, and a lot of people on this forum have worked through a very similar experience.
Hang in there.

wishing you the best day
ariel

[ariel]

Hi Kenley,
How are you doing?
Check in and let us know how goes it?

hope your day has been good
ariel

[Steve]

Kenley, I know it is hard. If you drink every night at six pm, try to make to 7pm. When 7 pm comes, try to make it to 8 pm. Once you are there, load yourself up with food and milk. If you are to full, it will take away the craving. The next day, keep alot of snacks around so you can keep the AV away. It takes alot of tries to get the quit to start sticking. I kept following off the wagon until finally it stuck. Good luck.

steve